The One With *Ugh* Slugs

Growing up I had a recurring dream-NO nightmare-that haunts me to date. Every so often when I think that calm has been restored in my life, the dream resurfaces and terror reigns supreme in my waking hours.

Disclaimer: I am very very petrigrossified of slugs. Definition: to scare and disgust the living daylights out of someone.

When I see a slug, I turn into a blubbering, shrieking, ninja basket case unable to continue with normal duties until it is salted.

 

This dream goes something like this:

I wake up in my room, in my bed, and try to sit up but suddenly cannot because I am surrounded by slugs. On every inch of my frame and all over the room; on the bed, the floor, the table, the lamb, the radio, the curtains, the roof, thousands and thousands of slugs. To add on to this horror, one slug is hanging dangerously off the roof right above me, slowly, slimily, slipping towards me.

I always wake up with creepy crawlies and the shivers and live in paranoia for the next couple of weeks.

The dream has always always been the same, until recently when the dream fairies decided to up it a notch. And didn’t they go ham on their magic fairy dust!

The revised version went something like this:

I woke up to go to my parents’ room after being chased out of mine by a vigilante wasp

(Now wasps are involved? Another creature that renders me a blubbering, shrieking, ninja basket case unable to continue with normal duties until it is swatted). 

In their room there were five slugs, two inside the room and three hovering and sliming at the door. And they were all trying to corner me.

Mum happily handed me salt then disappeared. I tiptoed towards the slug in the room (why not the one at the door so I could escape, I don’t know) and it literally jumped around and stared at me.

We locked eyes.

I threw the salt at it, screaming. 

A slime battle ensued as it tried to remove the salt with its hands only resulting in spreading it more.<seriously though, dream fairies, slug hands??? Too much,no?? UUGHH> I was laughing in joy & crying in mortification at the same time.

The slug eventually ceased to be.

I couldn't find its friend (another horror of slugs, their uncanny and creepy disappearing skills) 

and so decided to hop & leap outta the room to safety. Except these slugs were fast moving slugs trying to block me from exiting. So each step I took they cornered me until I had no choice but to move back into the room where the baby one followed me, and to add to the horror IT HAD A FACE. It kept crawling then began WALKING towards me, until finally it reached out its hand to me and forced me to pet it.

I woke up. And I never want to sleep again!